the initial excitement is wearing off as I continue to realize what all needs to be done to put our affairs in order and the realizations of just how much we will be tested ….. Last year there were various times I considered abandoning this marriage and I suppose there will be times in the future I will want to tread down that path again; however I’m holding out, hopelessly romantic through and through and envision us to be that old couple in the park holding hands….
I’m beginning to worry we aren’t applying ourselves as much as we should to the learning and research process as well as getting the house ready…. Combined with work, the farewell trips, friends over for dinner……. It will all even out; I’m just worrying probably unnecessarily… my last day at work is June 30 and we’re not leaving until the end of July so really I have plenty of time. I wish maybe we could’ve kept it secret for a while longer….. I just need to remember to breathe and get back into practicing some yoga. Early morning workouts are still going well and provide a great deal of stress release.
a ton of other things on my mind; I’d rather not bore you with details.. tomorrow going to a wedding in Tampa for the weekend so time flies as I attempt to stand still in the moment and just be.